Unreachable Potential

8 minute memoir - Reaching your unreachable potential

- topics found @anndeecandy

*****

There has always been something in me that would love to throw everything to the wind,and do the thing that is outside the box. For instance, my brother recently sent me a video about a couple living in a home-built trailer. This couple travels public lands, lives off grid, and makes their life the way they want it. Part of me totally wants to do this. To jump ship on society's game and live more truthfully. The other part of me has six children and a dog. Our trailer would need to be a tad bit larger, and hold a few more beds. Still, I have lots of things on this list of "things I would do if I were braver." They include:

- having chickens in the backyard

- taking down the wall between my kitchen and my dining room all by my onesies

- selling every scrap I owned and buying an airstream trailer to travel the country

- selling every scrap I owned and traveling the world

- being a real, live camping family

- learning how to build furniture out of wood - being good at power tools!!!!

- trying to eat less crappy food - (whole food) - which I know is healthier, but requires so much more effort


The funny thing is, while I'm making this list, I'm noticing there are some things I am really trying to do that are out of my comfort zone. I am trying to fix my house with the skills I have - oh so slowly, and oh so surely. I am trying to learn how to garden and plant beautiful flowers in my newly obtained yard. I am trying to write books - better books - and to do it faster. I am trying to find more ways to serve others around me, instead of living in a self-contained world in my house. I am making plans for my family to get into the outdoors and enjoy this lovely state of Idaho.

The unreachable potential. It's definitely out there, but is it possible to actually reach it? Some people do. It reminds me of the scene from Beauty and the Beast:

"I want adventure in the great wide somewhere, I want it more than I can tell."


But how to get there, how to be the person who make stuff happen?

I've been thinking about this lately, and what it takes to reach a goal. I read an article in the Wall Street Journal that discussed world-class athletes and how they push through pain and difficulties simply because they think they must. You know, because they think they must, they find the will to do, and with that mentality they accomplish more than the rest of us think is possible. One athlete completed a bronze-medal ski run while nursing a few broken ribs and a punctured lung. While, I don't really recommend stuff like this, the point is she did what had to be done, no matter the difficulties. Her brain pressed onward.

I know the concept of making this happen is real. My first baby born naturally came naturally by accident. I was too late for the epidural. They told me the baby would be born in 20 minutes, and I'd have to fight my way through. As soon as I knew that,  everything changed. The pain became manageable. I took a breath and did what had to be done. It wasn't giving up to the pain, as much as leaning in. After all, the only way out of that birth was all the way through. After Meg, I delivered my remaining four babies naturally. I knew it could be done, and I knew it treated me better in the long run. I think every task we approach is that way. That if we'll lean in instead of leaning away, we'll accomplish the impossible.

But oh, how difficult it is to lean it.

To try again.

Try again.

And this time, to do it better.

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